...That if I spend too long on something one time, I feel that I have to spend as much time the next time I do the same thing. I wrote way too much the past blogs, so now I think I have to write way too much on each additional blog! I wish I could just write a few sentences here and there, but I always feel like I have to explain things and it gets way to complicated...Ergo, I haven't posted in quite a few months! I've also been very busy though so that might explain it....with applying to colleges and everything. Now that I'm done with that I have some free time again! (Not that I still don't have a ton of school work to do.)
The thing I hate about school taking up so much of my life is that I feel that's all I have time for! Sure, I can do an extracurricular activity here and there, but school is THE focus of my life, and I don't like that. My day revolves around classes and homework, and then I'm too tired to do anything else! When I'm so tired out from school it really does feel like I'm not even alive and it sucks. If I ever had a real problem at home, or get sick, I would never be able to keep up with school. I don't even have time to have a relationship! I'm just lucky that my best friend understands that I don't have much extra time to do stuff, but it would be really hard keeping a boyfriend. The last time, I felt like all my time on the weekends was at his house, and I never had any time to myself. If I had a boyfriend now, I wouldn't have enough time to get to have an actual relationship with him. Sometimes I just wish I wouldn't have to go to college right away next year so I could spend some time NOT focused on school...I do really want to have a real life, and I'm hoping that when I have only a couple of classes a day, I can spend more time on myself and on making some real relationships!
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